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Messages - B. Llewellyn Thatcher

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1
Archived Applications / Re: Chartreuse Greene
« on: 01/05/2014 at 04:02 »
Miss Greene,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

2
Archived Applications / Re: Tomomi Asakura
« on: 01/05/2014 at 03:57 »
Miss Asakura,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

3
Archived Applications / Re: Caspian Chant
« on: 30/04/2014 at 03:56 »
Mr. Chant,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

4
Archived Applications / Re: Clementine Fowl
« on: 30/04/2014 at 03:49 »
Miss Fowl,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

5
Archived Applications / Re: Claire Douquette's application
« on: 29/04/2014 at 13:45 »
Miss Douquette,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

6
Archived Applications / Re: Maai Guildenn (Finished)
« on: 29/04/2014 at 02:43 »
Maai,

Thank you for taking another look at your RP response! This one is much closer to what we are looking for! That being said, two quick things.

Quote
Her eyes squinted a bit as the girl stared directly into the boy before her, sitting down with his head turned about.

Though slight, this could be considered a form of powerplaying. The last thing James does is stand up from the table in the Great Hall and storm off into the hallway. It doesn't say if he sat down or went into a classroom or anything, so the best thing to do is assume that he is still standing in the hallway when your character address him.

Also, at the end, you are very clear that Maai walked away from James. Unfortunately, this doesn't leave much room for James to react and would end the thread rather quickly. With any thread (though there are exceptions), we like to see it at least carried out to three posts per player. Perhaps instead of saying that Maai walked away you could say that she turned to walk away (clearly leaves the ability for James to say something like "Hey, wait!").

If you wouldn't mind taking another look at it and let us know when you've done so, we'd love to take another look too!

- B.

7
Archived Applications / Re: Claire Douquette's application
« on: 29/04/2014 at 01:22 »
Claire,

First off, welcome to HS.net! We couldn't be happier that the HP Wiki led you to us, and we cannot wait to see you roleplaying around the board!

Claire has such an interesting backstory! I also see that you have read up on our recent board plot, the Time Warp, and love that you have incorporated that into your biography! You have really done your research!

Two real quick and minor things that need addressing, and we can get you approved and playing with us! The first thing is Claire's birthday. You have it listed as May 20, 1941. Our current board year is 1941, so that would mean that Claire was just born (just an oversight, I am sure).  I love numbers, and I am all for helping people out, so if Claire is sorted as a fourth year, her birth year would be 1927 (and in case she is sorted as a fifth year, it would be 1926).

Also, you have listed in your appearance that Claire is 1 foot 3 inches. Was this a typo? If so, can you edit this as well, too? Once you've edited both the things mentioned, re-post your application and we will be more than happy to take another look! Can't wait to see you around the boards!

- B.

8
Archived Applications / Re: Reapplication - Lana Lancaster
« on: 29/04/2014 at 00:56 »
Miss Lancaster,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

9
Archived Applications / Re: Roche Harvey
« on: 29/04/2014 at 00:33 »
Mr. Harvey,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

10
Archived Applications / Re: Ariel Spark's Application
« on: 29/04/2014 at 00:08 »
Ariel,

Hello, and welcome to HS.net! We are glad that your Google search led you here and we can't wait to have you join us! Before we can accept you application, there's two things that needs addressing in you application.

Firstly, a little over five years ago (ICly, not OOCly), our board plot led us through something called the Time Warp. Essentially the Wizarding world slide back in time 38 years, from what would have been January 1, 1975 to January 1, 1937, leaving the Muggle world, its people and inventions behind. You can read more about the Time Warp and its effects on the Wizarding world here.

What this means for your character is that as of the Time Warp, Ariel wouldn't be able to visit her Muggle grandparents because as far as she would know, they don't exist (at first after the warp, she and her family may have thought they 'disappeared' but as time has passed, memories of them would have gotten fuzzier and fuzzier until they were all forgotten). If you could modify your biography to reflect this, as it is very important to our plot, that would be excellent!

Also, we are primarily a writing site, and therefore we would rather you describe what your character looks like in the appearance section of your application than post a picture. We use profile pictures help show us what you envision your character to look like, but writing it out is what brings your character to life!

When you are finished with your edits, please re-post your application below and we would love to take another look! Can't wait to have you playing with us!

- B.

11
Archived Applications / Re: Millie Graham
« on: 28/04/2014 at 01:04 »
Miss Graham,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

12
Archived Applications / Re: Irene Xavier
« on: 28/04/2014 at 00:26 »
Miss Xavier,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator





((Quick note: You will need to adjust Irene's birth year. Our Time Warp slid everything back in the Wizarding World 38 years, therefore 1958 would be adjusted to 1920. This would make Irene 20 going on 21 at the start of term, thus too old for Hogwarts. With sixth year as her main request, her birth year would be 1924 (1962 pre-warp) OR 1923 (1961 pre-warp) is she is accepted as a seventh year! Please make sure to make this adjustment! Thanks!

13
Suggestions & Questions / Re: Replying and Applications
« on: 27/04/2014 at 19:30 »
Whittney,

If your character has been accepted as a student, which he has, you should have access to post both in summer and Elsewhere. I fixed your permissions, so you should be able to post now!

If you have any other issues posting or other account related issues, please use our helpdesk feature and a GMod or Admin will address your issue as soon as possible!

- B.

14
Archived Applications / Re: Sanja Lizbet Waldemar
« on: 27/04/2014 at 03:53 »
Miss Waldemar,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May 2014. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
B. Llewellyn Thatcher,
Ravenclaw House Ghost/Duelling Coordinator

15
Suggestions & Questions / Re: Census
« on: 27/04/2014 at 02:51 »
Don't fret, it's a common question! You can find the blood census here.

16
Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Elena Fortina-Elsewhere Child
« on: 27/04/2014 at 02:48 »
Elena,

Just a few things of note from your application that will need to be reworked.

Firstly, you mention that Elena is currently age six, but in her biography you mention that at age six she experienced what we refer to as the Time Warp. While it is important that you mention it as Elena is a Muggleborn, by our current board time of 1941, the Time Warp occurred five and a half years ago which would make Elena about one at the time and unlikely to remember her parents or wander the streets. In that case, she mostly likely would have been picked up by someone from an orphanage and either raised there or been sent to the orphanage at St. Mungo's.

Also, at such a young age - while we are aware that magic does make it's appearance in tough situations - it's unlikely that magical ability could carry her for an extended amount of time as she made her way to Wizarding London.

If you could just take a good look your bio and present a time frame or storyline that makes a bit more sense, we will be glad to take another look at your application!

- B.

17
Archived Applications / Re: Maai Guildenn (Finished)
« on: 27/04/2014 at 02:22 »
Maai,

Hello and welcome to HS.net! We're so glad to have you here!

Maai's background is written beautifully and seems to have been well thought out! She is a very interesting character, and I cannot wait to see how you play her out around the site.

That being said, the only thing that needs to be addressed is your roleplay (RP) sample. While you have definitely taken a twist with it that we've never seen before, I am going to ask that you take another look at it.

The instructions of the RP sample state: "You come across one of these posts on the site. Please select one & reply as your character." More than likely this post is the start of an open thread in which anyone can join. While it's interesting that you took this on from the stand point that James is your brother, this would not be the case. I do understand that this is a sample, but we are looking to see how your character would respond if this was truly an 'open thread' at the castle. Unfortunately, I think that creating a relationship that wouldn't exist is taking too much of a creative liberty with the sample.

If you could just rework your RP sample, we would be more than glad to take another look at your application! Just repost it below when you are finished and we'll take that second look!

Thanks so much!

- B.

18
Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Paula F Klein
« on: 27/04/2014 at 01:53 »
Accepted!

19
Archived Applications / Re: Whittney McGuire
« on: 27/04/2014 at 00:33 »
Whittney,

Welcome to HS.net! We are so glad that you've chosen to come roleplay with us!

Whittney's application looks amazing! I love his backstory; it is definitely unique. Also, it's great that you picked up on our Time Warp plot line! Just a few quick things to address and then we can get you playing with all of us in no time.

First of all, you list Whittney's birth year as 1958/1921. Our current year is 1941, so that would make Whittney 20 years old and too old for Hogwarts.  I see that you requested sixth year as Whittney's primary year, so to make things easy, that would make his birth year 1925, or perhaps 1924 if he is a year 'behind' (1963 or 1962 respectively pre-time warp).

Secondly, there is some evidence of powereplaying in your roleplay (RP) response. Keep in mind that you are only able to control the actions of your own character and not someone else's character. There is not mention in the original RP of James throwing down his gloves or that he left mudprints as he ran down the corridor from the Great Hall. Please rework your RP response to remove all instances of powerplaying!

Once you've took a look at both of these things, please repost your application for us to take another look! Hope to get you playing with us all soon!

- B.

20
Elsa/Lana,

Thank you for looking over our recommendations, you're new application is coming along nicely! Just a couple of things.

First of all, if you would like to change Elsa's name to Lana (which is completely fine), we will need you to submit a helpdesk requesting the name change.

Secondly, I want to take a moment to look at this:

Quote
Due to his position as a city governor, her father was well known in the Littlehampton magical society, as well as in the muggle one.

Could you expand on this a little bit on this relationship, as I believe that it is a bit too ambiguous? As just a 'city governor,' why do you think the magical community would take such in interest in forming a relationship with him? Typically this type of relationship is between the Minister of Magic and someone with high status in the muggle world, such as the Prime Minister and then things are filtered down through the chain. Feel free to elaborate on this, or you may remove it altogether (it's up to you)!

Thirdly, there is some powerplaying in your roleplay response. Keep in mind that you may only control your character in your response. When you say that Lana took a peak at Astrid's parchment, you are assuming that Astrid would allow you to look at the parchment while the quill was writing. Perhaps Astrid would respond by covering the parchment so that Lana couldn't see it? Also, technically the quill would be controlled by Astrid as well (as it belongs to her), so unless her post stated that it wrote something about 'bias against Muggleborns', you wouldn't be able to say that the quill wrote it.

If you could take a look at these few things, then re-post your application, that would be fantastic!

- B.

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