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Author Topic: Amanda Mostyn REVISED student application  (Read 788 times)

ariana690

    (01/12/2011 at 21:37)
THE BASICS
Name: Amanda Mostyn also known as Mandy

CHARACTER DETAILS
House Request:
Ravenclaw would really fit me because I am very smart and I know how to get myself out of sticky situations. I am also very good at solving riddles. I have mostly been a teacher's pet. All the teachers love me. I never get into trouble and if I get near any trouble I always know how to maneuver other people into thinking that I was never part of the problem.

Year: 
1 or 2 works for me

Bloodline:
Muggleborn

Magical Strength (pick one):
Charms

Magical Weakness (pick one):
Divination

Biography:
I lived in Michigan with my parents and my two sisters Jordan and Sydney until I was 5. My mom and dad divorced and we had to move to Florida. My dad kept my sisters and I went with my mom. A few years went by and I started to notice some weird things going on. When I get mad sparks fly off the end of my fingers and when I have something in my hand it disappears suddenly. Things like that and others. I didn't find out I was a witch until I was 11. I was the only one in my family to be a witch. I wasn't too surprised when Professor Dumbledore told me because of the things I noticed about myself. So basically it's time for me to go to Hogwarts.


ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
Please include these sections if they are not addressed in your biography.

Personality:
I am very outgoing and friendly. I rarely get mad but if you make me mad watch out. My temper is not pretty. I enjoy reading, writing, acting, and singing. I love being on stage. The stage is my life. I am a musical theater geek. And when I'm not doing that I'm reading. I'm a nice person but I'm not very social. I have very few friends. Everywhere I go I have a book in my hand. I study constantly. I am also very stubborn. When I get an idea in my head, you can't budge me. I like to do things my way. I usually adhere to a very strict schedule. I can go with the flow at times but most of the time I have problems with change.

Appearance:
I have chocolate brown hair which I occasionally highlight with blonde streaks. That shows my outgoing personality. I wear glasses and often carry around sunglasses to wear for when I'm feeling ugly I can slip them on and feel like a different person. I'm not fat but I'm not slender either. I tend to cover myself up and not show much skin because I don't like my body. You'll never see me in a bathing suit in the summer.

SAMPLE ROLEPLAY
You come across one of these three posts on the site. Please reply to one only as your character would.
*** Remember, you can only roleplay your own character's actions, not James' or Astrid's.

Option I:

Blimey, the Great Hall was packed. It seemed like everywhere a guy looked there was some clown waving around a House banner or yelling about the game.

'Can you believe it?' 'No way!' 'This must be the biggest upset in Hogwarts Quidditch history...'

Stupid Quidditch.

James flopped into an empty seat at the end of the table, shoved an empty plate out of the way, and let his head sink onto his crossed arms, squishing his freckled nose down flat against the tabletop. He wasn't sure why he'd even bothered to come here, since he definitely wasn't hungry. He'd probably never eat again, in fact. He didn'tdeserve to eat. He hadn't stopped in the locker room to change out of his muddy, sweaty uniform after the game either, because he was pretty sure he probably didn't deserve to be clean too; and anyway he couldn't stand to see the looks on his team mates' faces after he blew their chance at winning one of the biggest games they had ever played.

Just one lousy shot. That's all it would have taken. If he could have just got that one stupid foul shot to go through that one stupid hoop, they could have won and he wouldn't have been the biggest blockhead in the entire school.

As if to prove the point, half the people at the next table suddenly broke into a loud victory chant. James pressed his face further into his arms to hide the bright red blotches he could feel creeping up his cheeks. That was it. He was just going to have to run away and move to Nova Scotia. He'd just cost the three-year-in-a-row Champions the Quidditch Cup! How do you ever live that one down for crying out loud? He was only a second year and he was going to spend the rest of his life as 'that dumb cry-baby kid who dropped the Quaffle!'

It felt like every set of eyes in the room was boring into him, and James couldn't stand it anymore. He jerked himself back up from the table and stomped right back out of the Hall the same way he had come in. As he stormed into the quieter hallway outside, he could hear footsteps somewhere behind him. James rounded on the sound and began to shout, his brown eyes shining with tears. "WHAT! Haven't you ever seen a loser before? Why don't you just take a picture!"

Sample Roleplay Response: I gasped as James looked at me. I didn't even know him that well. We're in two different houses. I didn't know how to react to that. "I was only going to the library. I'm sorry you feel that way. I'll just go." I just walked away as I felt his eyes boring into the back of my head. As soon as I turned the corner, I gave a sigh of relief. I hope I don't get involved into any more drama today. The only drama I need is on the stage. That reminded me, I had theater rehearsal at 3. I made a mental note to be on time. By that time I was at the library. I walked in and sat down to study.

Optional: If you are new to our site, please let us know how you found us.
I was searching google for interactive Harry Potter sites and I found this.

ariana690

    (01/12/2011 at 22:24)
Correct! - A.I. I forgot to add that.
« Last Edit: 03/12/2011 at 19:30 by Anneka Ivanova »

Esme Vartan

    (01/12/2011 at 22:37)
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  • Lead Researcher, Supra Mortalitas
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Hi Mandy! Welcome to Hogwarts!

Just a few things before we can accept your application:
- Please make a username with your character's first and last name.
- Your RP response should be written in third person (e.g. 'he said' rather than 'I said')
- In our universe, there is no Dumbledore or any of the other Harry Potter characters. Check out the FAQ forum for more information on what is in our universe. :)

Just post your revised application in this forum and we'll take another look! Thanks!

ariana690

    (01/12/2011 at 22:39)
So basically I have to start all over again? Is that what I need to do?

Esme Vartan

    (02/12/2011 at 02:14)
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  • Lead Researcher, Supra Mortalitas
    • View Profile
No, simply revise the things that I mentioned in my first post. If you'd like to do more, that's up to you.

Amanda Mostyn

    (02/12/2011 at 19:08)
  • 1st Year
  • C2D0T1S1
    • View Profile
THE BASICS
Name: Amanda Mostyn also known as Mandy

CHARACTER DETAILS
House Request:
Ravenclaw would really fit me because I am very smart and I know how to get myself out of sticky situations. I am also very good at solving riddles. I have mostly been a teacher's pet. All the teachers love me. I never get into trouble and if I get near any trouble I always know how to maneuver other people into thinking that I was never part of the problem.

Year: 
1 or 2 works for me

Bloodline:
Muggleborn

Magical Strength (pick one):
Charms

Magical Weakness (pick one):
Divination

Biography:
I lived in Michigan with my parents and my two sisters Jordan and Sydney until I was 5. My mom and dad divorced and we had to move to Florida. My dad kept my sisters and I went with my mom. A few years went by and I started to notice some weird things going on. When I get mad sparks fly off the end of my fingers and when I have something in my hand it disappears suddenly. Things like that and others. I didn't find out I was a witch until I was 11. I was the only one in my family to be a witch. I couldn't go to a regular high school because I wasn't normal. Another woman knew what I was and told me she was a witch too. She told me all about Hogwarts and told me that I should go. So basically it's time for me to go to Hogwarts.


ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
Please include these sections if they are not addressed in your biography.

Personality:
I am very outgoing and friendly. I rarely get mad but if you make me mad watch out. My temper is not pretty. I enjoy reading, writing, acting, and singing. I love being on stage. The stage is my life. I am a musical theater geek. And when I'm not doing that I'm reading. I'm a nice person but I'm not very social. I have very few friends. Everywhere I go I have a book in my hand. I study constantly. I am also very stubborn. When I get an idea in my head, you can't budge me. I like to do things my way. I usually adhere to a very strict schedule. I can go with the flow at times but most of the time I have problems with change.

Appearance:
I have chocolate brown hair which I occasionally highlight with blonde streaks. That shows my outgoing personality. I wear glasses and often carry around sunglasses to wear for when I'm feeling ugly I can slip them on and feel like a different person. I'm not fat but I'm not slender either. I tend to cover myself up and not show much skin because I don't like my body. You'll never see me in a bathing suit in the summer.

SAMPLE ROLEPLAY
You come across one of these three posts on the site. Please reply to one only as your character would.
*** Remember, you can only roleplay your own character's actions, not James' or Astrid's.

Option I:

Blimey, the Great Hall was packed. It seemed like everywhere a guy looked there was some clown waving around a House banner or yelling about the game.

'Can you believe it?' 'No way!' 'This must be the biggest upset in Hogwarts Quidditch history...'

Stupid Quidditch.

James flopped into an empty seat at the end of the table, shoved an empty plate out of the way, and let his head sink onto his crossed arms, squishing his freckled nose down flat against the tabletop. He wasn't sure why he'd even bothered to come here, since he definitely wasn't hungry. He'd probably never eat again, in fact. He didn'tdeserve to eat. He hadn't stopped in the locker room to change out of his muddy, sweaty uniform after the game either, because he was pretty sure he probably didn't deserve to be clean too; and anyway he couldn't stand to see the looks on his team mates' faces after he blew their chance at winning one of the biggest games they had ever played.

Just one lousy shot. That's all it would have taken. If he could have just got that one stupid foul shot to go through that one stupid hoop, they could have won and he wouldn't have been the biggest blockhead in the entire school.

As if to prove the point, half the people at the next table suddenly broke into a loud victory chant. James pressed his face further into his arms to hide the bright red blotches he could feel creeping up his cheeks. That was it. He was just going to have to run away and move to Nova Scotia. He'd just cost the three-year-in-a-row Champions the Quidditch Cup! How do you ever live that one down for crying out loud? He was only a second year and he was going to spend the rest of his life as 'that dumb cry-baby kid who dropped the Quaffle!'

It felt like every set of eyes in the room was boring into him, and James couldn't stand it anymore. He jerked himself back up from the table and stomped right back out of the Hall the same way he had come in. As he stormed into the quieter hallway outside, he could hear footsteps somewhere behind him. James rounded on the sound and began to shout, his brown eyes shining with tears. "WHAT! Haven't you ever seen a loser before? Why don't you just take a picture!"

Sample Roleplay Response: She gasped as James looked at her. She didn't even know him that well. They're in two different houses. She didn't know how to react to that. "I was only going to the library. I'm sorry you feel that way. I'll just go." She just walked away as she felt his eyes boring into the back of her head. As soon as she turned the corner, she gave a sigh of relief. She hoped she didn't get involved into any more drama today. The only drama she needs is on the stage. That reminded her, she had theater rehearsal at 3. She made a mental note to be on time. By that time she was at the library. She walked in and sat down to study.

Optional: If you are new to our site, please let us know how you found us.
I was searching google for interactive Harry Potter sites and I found this.

Amanda Mostyn

    (02/12/2011 at 21:14)
  • 1st Year
  • C2D0T1S1
    • View Profile
Got it! - A.I. I forgot to add that.
« Last Edit: 03/12/2011 at 19:29 by Anneka Ivanova »

Amanda Mostyn

    (02/12/2011 at 22:05)
  • 1st Year
  • C2D0T1S1
    • View Profile
I updated my application for you. I reposted it as an update so you know that is the new one.

* Anneka Ivanova

    (03/12/2011 at 19:28)
  • ***
  • Hogwarts Headmistress
  • [Winner!] HSNet 30-Day Challenge
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Your application looks better. There are a couple more changes I'm going to ask you to make before accepting it.

- Can you expand on your biography? How did Mandy feel about her parents divorcing and being separated from her sisters? Did she like moving to Florida? What was her life like there? Did she make any close friends? What about the woman who found out she was a witch, how did she know? Why did Mandy end up at Hogwarts instead of a wizarding school in the United States? The more we know, the easier it will be for us to sort you into the correct house.

- In your RP response, you should give James something to reply to. If this were a real thread, Mandy walking off would have ended it. Check out our sample applications to see how others have done this.

Post your changes here, and we'll look over it again. Thanks!
and if I'm flying solo, at least I'm flying free
to those who ground me, take a message back from me
tell them how I am defying gravity

Amanda Mostyn

    (04/12/2011 at 18:38)
  • 1st Year
  • C2D0T1S1
    • View Profile
THE BASICS
Name: Amanda Mostyn also known as Mandy

CHARACTER DETAILS
House Request:
Ravenclaw would really fit me because I am very smart and I know how to get myself out of sticky situations. I am also very good at solving riddles. I have mostly been a teacher's pet. All the teachers love me. I never get into trouble and if I get near any trouble I always know how to maneuver other people into thinking that I was never part of the problem.

Year: 
1 or 2 works for me

Bloodline:
Muggleborn

Magical Strength (pick one):
Charms

Magical Weakness (pick one):
Divination

Biography:
I lived in Michigan with my parents and my two sisters Jordan and Sydney until I was 5. My mom and dad divorced and we had to move to Florida. I didn't mind moving since I haven't started school yet. My dad kept my sisters and I went with my mom. I didn't understand why it was just me and my mom leaving. I felt bad leaving my sisters behind. When we did go I missed my sisters a lot. On occasion they did come to visit whenever my dad was able to get off of work. But it still wasn't the same. A few years went by and I started to notice some weird things going on. When I get mad sparks fly off the end of my fingers and when I have something in my hand it disappears suddenly. Things like that and others. I couldn't go to a regular school because I wasn't normal. That's when I found out my mom was offered a really good job in London. I didn't want to go because I did have a few friends who lived really close to me. Maddie and Hannah were very upset when I told them that I had to move again. We spent our last night together. They promised to write. After we moved, I found out I was a witch. I was 11 at the time. We had a few neighbors. There was an older woman who lived next door to us. She looked at me funny a few times like she could see right through me. One time she walked by me as I tried to jiggle the doorknob because it was locked. I don't know what I did but it magically flew open. She came over to me and she said I was a witch. She said that she was too. She pulled out some stick and told me that it was her wand. She flicked it and the door closed all by itself. She told me all about Hogwarts and told me that I should go. So basically it's time for me to go to Hogwarts.


ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
Please include these sections if they are not addressed in your biography.

Personality:
I am very outgoing and friendly. I rarely get mad but if you make me mad watch out. My temper is not pretty. I enjoy reading, writing, acting, and singing. I love being on stage. The stage is my life. I am a musical theater geek. And when I'm not doing that I'm reading. I'm a nice person but I'm not very social. I have very few friends. Everywhere I go I have a book in my hand. I study constantly. I am also very stubborn. When I get an idea in my head, you can't budge me. I like to do things my way. I usually adhere to a very strict schedule. I can go with the flow at times but most of the time I have problems with change.

Appearance:
I have chocolate brown hair which I occasionally highlight with blonde streaks. That shows my outgoing personality. I wear glasses and often carry around sunglasses to wear for when I'm feeling ugly I can slip them on and feel like a different person. I'm not fat but I'm not slender either. I tend to cover myself up and not show much skin because I don't like my body. You'll never see me in a bathing suit in the summer.

SAMPLE ROLEPLAY
You come across one of these three posts on the site. Please reply to one only as your character would.
*** Remember, you can only roleplay your own character's actions, not James' or Astrid's.

Option I:

Blimey, the Great Hall was packed. It seemed like everywhere a guy looked there was some clown waving around a House banner or yelling about the game.

'Can you believe it?' 'No way!' 'This must be the biggest upset in Hogwarts Quidditch history...'

Stupid Quidditch.

James flopped into an empty seat at the end of the table, shoved an empty plate out of the way, and let his head sink onto his crossed arms, squishing his freckled nose down flat against the tabletop. He wasn't sure why he'd even bothered to come here, since he definitely wasn't hungry. He'd probably never eat again, in fact. He didn'tdeserve to eat. He hadn't stopped in the locker room to change out of his muddy, sweaty uniform after the game either, because he was pretty sure he probably didn't deserve to be clean too; and anyway he couldn't stand to see the looks on his team mates' faces after he blew their chance at winning one of the biggest games they had ever played.

Just one lousy shot. That's all it would have taken. If he could have just got that one stupid foul shot to go through that one stupid hoop, they could have won and he wouldn't have been the biggest blockhead in the entire school.

As if to prove the point, half the people at the next table suddenly broke into a loud victory chant. James pressed his face further into his arms to hide the bright red blotches he could feel creeping up his cheeks. That was it. He was just going to have to run away and move to Nova Scotia. He'd just cost the three-year-in-a-row Champions the Quidditch Cup! How do you ever live that one down for crying out loud? He was only a second year and he was going to spend the rest of his life as 'that dumb cry-baby kid who dropped the Quaffle!'

It felt like every set of eyes in the room was boring into him, and James couldn't stand it anymore. He jerked himself back up from the table and stomped right back out of the Hall the same way he had come in. As he stormed into the quieter hallway outside, he could hear footsteps somewhere behind him. James rounded on the sound and began to shout, his brown eyes shining with tears. "WHAT! Haven't you ever seen a loser before? Why don't you just take a picture!"

Sample Roleplay Response: She gasped as James turned to look at her. She didn't even know him that well. They're in two different houses. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to......" She started to back away. "Are you okay?" she asked James.

Optional: If you are new to our site, please let us know how you found us.
I was searching google for interactive Harry Potter sites and I found this.


* Anneka Ivanova

    (04/12/2011 at 19:39)
  • ***
  • Hogwarts Headmistress
  • [Winner!] HSNet 30-Day Challenge
    • View Profile
Miss Mostyn,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Term begins 01 January. Currently, students have gathered at the Summer Campus for the holiday. You may also wish to visit the Elsewhere board to purchase your school supplies. Both the Summer and Elsewhere boards may be accessed via the Floo Network. We look forward to seeing you at the Castle.

Sincerely,


Anneka Ivanova
and if I'm flying solo, at least I'm flying free
to those who ground me, take a message back from me
tell them how I am defying gravity

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