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Messages - Michael Woods-Taylor

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Hello Matt! Your application is off to a great start, there are just a few things that need to be worked on before we move forward :)

First off, we ask that you answer as many of the question as you can on the template. Birthdate is missing. It helps to assure to us that you know what time frame we are working in and that you've given some thought to important dates in your character's life. Depending on the writer, a winter/spring/summer/fall child affects their characters way of thinking a bit. Sometimes it doesn't of course ;) but yeah, if you could just give us an idea of Matt's Birth month/day, we'd appreciate it.

Ooh, and don't forget to fill in the biography section!

Finally, I love your Sample RP, but it might fit better if worked into a Biography of sorts, as we add two options for you to respond to within the application template. Responding to someone else's writing can sometimes be a touch different than responding to your own NPC characters, so we ask that you show us how your character might react to a completely uncontrollable second-person situation.

If you just make the changes and then respond back to this thread, we will take another look at the application! Thanks.

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Archived Applications / Re: Amy Bell
« on: 30/07/2013 at 03:50 »
Hello Amy! Love the app, I was just curious if you are applying to be an elsewhere child so that you can start RPing right away... before applying again to be a Hogwarts student on or after August 1st. Or are you planning on, in name only, attending the school while really just hanging out with all us awesome people in Elsewhere? :D

Ooh and whatever your decision is, you will have to contact via Personal Message, Eve Hallows about the lovely avatar you are using. Eve Hallows is an Elsewhere character, recently graduated from Hogwarts, using Jennifer Connelly as her avatar. It might be a little confusing having such similar avatars floating around. Ultimately any potential sharing of avatars is between you and Ms Hallows though.

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Miss Pritchett,

Congratulations, your application to Beauxbatons Academy has been accepted. Term has begun as of 01 May; please make your way to the Academy as soon as possible to begin classes. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
Michael Woods-Taylor


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Archived Applications / Re: Amber Larson revised b
« on: 15/05/2013 at 22:17 »
Hello Amber ^_^

Your application is coming along! I would like to see a bit more narration in your Roleplay response though.

We do have threads that are primarily dialog in nature, but more often the responses and interactions between characters you will see are a bit longer, contain descriptions of what the character is feeling, maybe why they are sporting a mood - happy, sad or otherwise, and sometimes little details about their appearance if that is something that helps set the mood of a moment. It is nice to provide these bits of extra information because it gives your writing partner something to respond to and a world to interact in.

Please set a mood, give us more of an idea about what Amber thinks about Simon and how the boy wants to simply take over. Is Amber secretly happy that Simon wants to do all the work, even though she wants to avoid being accused of cheating? Is she furious that Simon 'might' be implying that Amber cannot produce adequate answers?

If you could add to your roleplay response and reply below, we will take a look at the application again.

Thanks!

-MWT

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Accepted!

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Archived Applications / Re: Kirby Smurthwaite
« on: 08/05/2013 at 23:14 »
Ooh lovely, thanks for the changes!

I'm curious though about how Kirby took to her mother disappearing during the time slide. She seems to be very close to her family, they being supportive of her and all and I was wondering how you considered the sudden missing element in the family. Memory of her mother might be pretty vague after a year and a half now but it helps to give us an idea of how Kirby deals with change. Did she bully through and search for the hope all around her? Was she crushed and only over time and fading memory become the brassy little girl again?  If you could put a little blurb into your biography that touches on how she dealt with the affects of the time slide, that would be great!

Also, and this isn't necessary to put into the application I am just curious, does Kirby wonder why her father never spoke much about the wizarding world? Am I getting the right impression in your biography that the father raised his two children mostly according to muggle traditions?

If you would like, you can simply answer by posting a reply to this thread, rather than editing your application. What ever is easier for you.

-MWT

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Archived Applications / Re: Kirby Smurthwaite
« on: 08/05/2013 at 21:32 »
Hello Kirby and Welcome to the site! Your application is lovely and your character seems wonderful ^_^ We just have a few things to go over before we move forward.

First, Kirby’s ability to talk to animals would be a special request. You can find the form here. Just fill it out and PM it to the administrator in charge of Beauxbatons – Darcy Audley (or Lyndon Audley). In order to move ahead with your application, regardless of the special request status, you can simply remove the reference to her talking with animals.

Also, our world recently went through some changes and Kirby being a muggleborn would have been greatly affected by them. We refer to it as the ‘Time warp’ or ‘Slide’ where the wizarding world slid back in time thirty-eight years while leaving the muggle world as it was. To find out more click here. As it is now, Kirby would have lost both her parents by the beginning of 1937, and would probably be an orphan. If you could elaborate a bit about how this change affected her world that would be great! If you would like to keep a parent around then you might want to consider saying one parent was a wizard.

Please reply with your edits below and we will take another look!

-MWT

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Nicole Ouellet
« on: 01/05/2013 at 19:40 »
Hello Nicole, your application looks great! I would love it if you replied to this post once you get word back on the status of your special request, so that we can process your app accordingly. If it is approved then nothing will change, and if it is denied at this time you will simply need to adjust the magic levels and reply to the standard RP scenario. Thank you so much!

- MWT

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Archived Applications / Re: Draconia Yule Ellewood
« on: 25/04/2013 at 04:27 »
Hello Draconia and welcome! First off, in order to change your name we ask that you submit a helpdesk ticket titled 'Name change' and provide us with the name you wish to have. The helpdesk is located at the top of your screen, hover over the link and chose 'Post New Ticket'.

As for your application, there are just a few things I would like you to alter before we can consider it.

First, because you are requesting either a first year OR a fourth year, we ask that you provide the 300 word-minimum biography, so that we have more to go on in case you are chosen as a fourth year. I love the bit about family history, but now tell us about how they see themselves, what they like to do with their time? How does Draconia feel about her father leaving for adventures in Romania?

Once you make these changes and repost your application in this thread, we will take another look. Thanks!

-MWT

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: F. E. Reinhardt
« on: 25/04/2013 at 03:53 »
Accepted!

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Archived Applications / Re: Elena Draginoff
« on: 25/04/2013 at 03:05 »
Hello, and thank you for making the changes to your application. There are a couple things that should still be addressed before we can move forward.

First Elena's birth year still needs some attention, and the equation Darcy provided will work beautifully:     Birth Year = 1938 - character age

Second, although you rectified the issue with Gau's death, I still feel like the theme you are working with teeters on being rather harsh, possibly too harsh for our site rating.

Would it be possible for you to keep the references to Gau's commitment to some establishment/asylum very very subtle? I am worried that the following is inching into a very serious situation that might slip over our rating requirement.

Quote
That meant there was no reason for Gau to be allowed to live with other who were in their families eyes perfect. She had cried, had screamed and had done everything she could to attempt to get them to listen to her. They however didn't pay her any attention, crying to Demetri, he had only looked away and said that what must be must be.

It might come across better if Elena is written as thinking the worst and so wishes to be transferred, when in reality she does not know what became of her brother... maybe he is perfectly fine and attending a better school! *wink* This is of course only necessary right now, if you receive approval for such a story line then the bio can be altered a bit, but always keep in mind the site rating.

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Archived Applications / Re: Coco Swaan
« on: 25/04/2013 at 02:30 »
Hello Coco! Your application is coming along nicely, I would just like you to consider a few things:

First, Coco's brother will be a major element in her life until he can attend school, could you expand on how you might work this out? Were you planning on seeing if a professor or other staff at BB would take pity on them and adopt? Would you place the two of them at a local wizarding orphanage and write that Coco is allowed to attend Beaubatons? (this seems like the easiest to explain)

Second, our roleplays are written in third person past tense. Your sample reply is primarily in present tense. This will need to be fixed before we can move forward.

Third, in the sample roleplay, you wrote that a boy catches her interest because he has an elaborate hair style. Because we ask that all characters posses features found in nature, NPCs follow the same requirement. This is also a very proper boarding school and such drastic hair/clothing/eye features would likely not be allowed. Yes this is a magic world but we try to keep things fairly realistic.

Finally, you may only control your character's reactions, and in your sample roleplay you responded for Hilary. Please remember power-playing is not allowed unless you gain permission beforehand from the writer for simple things.

Your application is coming along beautifully though, and once you address these points and re-post the application to this thread, we will take another look!

-MWT

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Archived Applications / Re: John Izard Senior/7th year
« on: 25/04/2013 at 01:08 »
Mr Izard,

Congratulations, your application to Hogwarts School has been accepted. Term begins 01 May, 2013. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
Michael Woods-Taylor

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Archived Applications / Re: Morgana Morianne Willows
« on: 17/04/2013 at 22:55 »
Hello Morgana,

Welcome to Hoggies!  I enjoyed reading your application, there are just a few things that need to be addressed before we can get you accepted:

1. Morgana’s birth month is listed at the top as June and then you have it as March in the bio – just a little edit is required there ^_^

2. Also, our roleplays are written in third person past tense. Your sample roleplay jumps around a bit in its tenses.

3. Lastly, you state in the biography that Morgana’s twins are considered ‘the hottest twins at Hogwarts’. This might be true among certain circles but it is almost like a sweeping power play move over the entire school body. It would be nice if you could minimize the audience of that general declaration. Maybe Morgana overheard a small group of girls as they praised her brothers, declaring that they ‘could just be the hottest twins at Hogwarts!’ And now Morgana feels like she might be treated differently because of the belief of a few.

I’m basically saying the same thing you did, I just made the group judgment element a little smaller ^_^

If you could make these tiny changes and resubmit the application as a reply to this thread, we would greatly appreciate it. Thanks!

- MWT

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Monsieur Roland-Alexander,

Congratulations, your application to Beauxbatons Academy has been accepted. Term begins 01 May, 2013. Currently, students have gathered at Camp Loki. Your admission is joint for both the school and Camp Loki, and we encourage you to spend your summer there. Should you choose, you may also visit our Elsewhere board via the Floo Network to visit or purchase school supplies. We look forward to seeing you at the School.


Regards,
Michael Woods-Taylor

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Quinn Calverly
« on: 10/04/2013 at 21:33 »
Hello Quinn! All looks good with your application, and yes I would just as soon alter things like stats later if the request goes through. I did have a question however, Quinn was very close to her parents, and although she is now grown up and independent, I was wondering how the time warp affected her emotionally.

Her mother was muggle, and father was a squib right? Did they both disappear? Is the father still around? I just wondered if you had given that any thought :)

Any who, this application has been accepted!

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Arthur MacLaren - Child
« on: 10/04/2013 at 09:40 »
Accepted!

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Accepted!

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Hugo Igneous Payne | Shop Request
« on: 05/04/2013 at 22:17 »
Accepted :)

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Elsewhere Accepted / Re: Child App: Katya Marie Renard
« on: 05/04/2013 at 21:07 »
Hey Katya!

Your app is looking great :) I just want to draw your attention to the role play response. I love it, but I would like to see a little something to make it more inviting for little Janey Hurst to respond to - an opening let's say. Right now it could be taken as the end of an interaction between characters. To change this, you could add something as simple as a thought, "if the girl chose to follow, Katya wouldn't care, strangers were only strangers until they weren't..."

Just a little something that spurs on a response from the other writer!

Thanks,

-MWT

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